


Sing For Ourselves Alone

by templeg



Category: The Book of Mormon - Parker/Stone/Lopez
Genre: (the literal kind), Connor has a much dirtier mind than Kevin does, Drunk Dancing, Drunken Confessions, Drunkenness, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Religious Guilt, Sleeping Together
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-23
Updated: 2014-01-23
Packaged: 2018-01-09 19:34:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,971
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1149957
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/templeg/pseuds/templeg
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Connor is a flirty drunk and Kevin is a dork. Title from Transcendental Youth by the Mountain Goats</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sing For Ourselves Alone

Given the creative version of Mormonism Arnold taught, it shouldn’t really come as a surprise to anyone that he neglected to mention the ban on alcohol. And yet, when they find the bottle on their doorstep with a ‘text’ reading MA HA NEI BU ELDERS, LOVE NABULUNGI, no-one really knows what to do with it. They put it on the coffee table and for a long time they just sit around, staring at it. Kevin is about to take it and stow it in the back of a cupboard somewhere when McKinley huffs.

‘Oh em gosh, you are all so boring.’ He grabs the bottle, unscrews the cap and takes a long swig. Kevin watches with horror as he swallows, pauses, and then screws up his face, coughing. ‘Blech.’

‘Elder McKinley!’, he stammers, as his brain for some reason replays the image of McKinley’s lips wrapped around the neck of the bottle. ‘What do you think you’re doing?’

McKinley smiles at him, a smile that seems somehow much more suggestive than usual. ‘Celebrating.’

*****

 

 _It’s not like you’ve never seen him dance before,_ Kevin tells himself, as McKinley takes to the coffee table. He has abstained from touching a drop of the ominous-looking liquid, and though most of the other elders have not been quite so restrained, McKinley has had at least half the bottle to himself. His tie is loosened, his hair is a wild, sweaty mess, and his tap dancing has degenerated into something…something _definitely not tap dancing._

‘I didn’t know Elder McKinley could do body rolls’, Arnold remarks casually. Kevin tries to make a non-committal ‘mm’ sound in reply, but it comes out sort of strangled.

‘ELDER PRICE!’ McKinley yells, hopping down off the coffee table. He’s very close. Kevin can feel his breath on his ear. ‘Elder Price, you look uncomfortable. You should drink. You shouldn’t be uncomfortable.’

‘There isn’t any more’, Kevin tells him. ‘You drank it all.’ Elder McKinley blinks up at him, pouting. Kevin can’t take his eyes off his lower lip. Then he seems to get over it. ‘Then I guess we’ll have to find a different way to make you comfortable.’

Kevin feels something tugging at his tie and looks down to see McKinley winding it around his hand. His hand brushes over Kevin’s chest. Kevin freezes and stares fixedly at a point over McKinley’s head. His face feels very hot, like steam might come out of his ears at any moment, and he can’t move his hands for fear that they might collide with parts of McKinley that are disconcertingly close (not that he’s looking).

‘You know, you’re a great Mormon, Elder Price.’

Kevin smiles. _In vino veritas_ , he supposes. ‘Thank you. You know, I really-’

‘You have very pretty eyelashes. I bet Joseph Smith had pretty eyelashes. Not as pretty as yours, though.’ Kevin blinks at him. McKinley makes a wailing sound.

‘Uh-’

‘STOP FLUTTERING YOUR PRETTY EYELASHES. I CAN’T STAND IT.’ He buries his face in Kevin’s neck. Kevin can feel the warmth of his skin against his collarbone. He pats his back awkwardly. ‘I’m…sorry?’

McKinley pulls back to look intently into Kevin’s eyes. ‘I forgive you.’ Kevin searches for something to say, but he’s distracted by the closeness of McKinley’s face to his, and by the fact that his hand appears to be sliding down Kevin’s torso. Kevin swallows and closes his eyes, but McKinley’s hand moves to his waist at the last minute. He sways in time to the music, his head drooping back onto Kevin’s shoulder.

‘Elder Price?’

Kevin puts a hand on his back, just to steady him. He doesn’t want him to topple over, or anything. ‘Yeah?’

‘Are we slow dancing?’

He’s rescued from having to answer by a tap on his shoulder. Elder Thomas is looking at McKinley, concerned. ‘Wow, he’s really drunk. You should take him home, Elder Price.’

Kevin freezes. ‘What do you- I would _never_ \- even if I- he’s _practically unconscious!’_

Elder Thomas raises an eyebrow. ‘I meant you should take him back to his room. Since he’s already sort of attached to you.’

Blushing, Kevin hoists McKinley up into a sort of bridal hold. McKinley squeaks and tightens his arms around Kevin’s neck. Kevin just about manages not to drop him as he makes his awkward way across the room.

‘You are devilishly handsome, Elder Price’, McKinley murmurs in his ear. His lips brush Kevin’s ear, and- did he just _bite his earlobe?_

‘GNAUGH’, Kevin says, and very nearly drops him. Several elders turn to look at him. ‘Just a sneeze, sorry!’ Elder Thomas does not look convinced. ‘Allergies! You know…dust and…allergies!’

Mercifully, he makes it into McKinley and Elder Thomas’s room and deposits him on the bed. McKinley makes a squealing noise that, inexplicably, makes Kevin think of kittens. He pulls the covers up to his chin, making sure he’s properly tucked in, and turns to go, but finds himself unable to. He looks down. Elder McKinley has hold of his tie.

‘Um.’ He tugs at the tie, first gently, then harder, to no avail. McKinley’s grip is like iron. ‘Elder McKinley?’ He shakes him gently. McKinley lets out a tiny, snuffling snore. ‘…Connor?’

No response. Elder Price contemplates the situation. McKinley looks so peaceful. He doesn’t look like he’s having a hell dream, which is rare enough- the walls are thin, and just because he’s learned to get to sleep in spite of the moaning from McKinley’s room, doesn’t mean he can’t appreciate the sight of McKinley sleeping soundly.

He’s starting to get neck cramp. Kevin sighs and kneels by McKinley’s bed, like he’s about to pray. He’ll wake him in a minute. Just let him have a little while longer.

Kevin wakes up to a sore neck and aching knees. He jerks upwards in confusion, nearly throttling himself, and McKinley yelps and his eyes fly open. ‘Elder Price?’ He blinks, and then puts a hand over his eyes. ‘Oh gosh, my _head_. Elder Price, what on earth are you doing there?’

‘You wouldn’t let go of my tie’, Kevin grumbles, because his knees _hurt_. Everything hurts, and he wasn’t even the one drinking. ‘What, do you think I used your sternum as a pillow for my own amusement?’

‘So you just…stayed there all night?’ Elder McKinley is looking at him strangely. Kevin glances away, embarrassed. Suddenly McKinley gasps. ‘We- we _shared a bed._ That’s against missionary rules!’

Kevin gapes at him. ‘You drank half a bottle of…of…I don’t even _know_ what last night, and you’re freaking out because we _shared a bed?_ Technically we didn’t even _share_ a bed. You shared a bed with my torso, the rest of me was getting better acquainted with the floor. That’s like half a violation, at most.’

McKinley groans and flops back onto the bed, covering his face with his hands. ‘Oh, heck. Heck, he-hang on. Why didn’t you just take your tie off?’

‘That- I didn’t- that did not occur to me.’

McKinley giggles. ‘You have…all down your face…’ He reaches out and touches Kevin’s cheek. Kevin starts. ‘I think this here is from a button.’

Kevin _hmmpfh_ s. ‘Did you at least sleep all right? Since I’ve-‘ he tries to stand, and winces, ‘-permanently crippled myself for your sake, and all. My knees are killing me.’

McKinley chokes, turning pink. Kevin looks at him. ‘What?’

‘Oh, gosh. Nothing. It’s nothing.’

Kevin frowns. He can’t help but feel like there’s a joke he’s not getting, and he hates being left out of things. ‘I’m glad you find the fact that my knees are probably black and blue so amusing.’

McKinley doesn’t say anything. An awkward silence ensues.

'Thanks for- staying with me, Elder Price.’ A smile tugs at the corner of his mouth. ‘You know, you’re a great Mormon.’

‘…You remember that.’ He’s not sure why this throws him, why it makes his heart speed up. ‘I thought you- I mean, you were so-’

‘I remember.’

‘Oh.’ Silence, again. ‘Do you…remember anything else?’ he asks, just to have something to say. McKinley is staring down at the blanket, but Kevin can see a flush spread down the back of his neck.

‘Elder Price, I should…apologise. The way I behaved…it was inappropriate, and…and sinful, and I’m very sorry for making you uncomfortable.’ His voice gets smaller and smaller. Kevin’s stomach tightens.

‘You- you didn’t. I mean, I wasn’t uncomfortable.’ McKinley looks up at him, blank-faced.

‘You don’t have to say that.’

‘I wasn’t!’ Kevin scrambles for something, anything that might make McKinley look less sad. ‘It was actually, uh…it was sort of…you were sort of…cute.’

McKinley looks down at the blanket again. ‘ _You_ thought I was cute?’ There’s a sarcastic edge to his voice. The corner of his mouth twitches. ‘Elder Price, you of all people ought to know Mormons don't lie.’

‘That’s _ridiculous_ ’, Kevin says, exasperated. He doesn’t know why this is so important to him, but it just _bothers_ him, the way he brushed it off so easily. ‘Why wouldn’t you believe that? I’m pretty, I’m not _blind_.’

Another silence.

‘Elder Price?’ McKinley is twisting his hands in his lap, digging at a hangnail. ‘If I- if I meant what- last night- I meant- I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I should go, forget it.’

Kevin is baffled, and a little annoyed. ‘This is your room.’ _And Elder Thomas’s. Where is Elder Thomas, anyway?_

‘Then maybe you should.’

Kevin presses his lips together. ‘What if I don’t want to?’

McKinley looks at Kevin’s position, still half-kneeling, half-sitting on the hard wooden floor, and raises an eyebrow. ‘Yes, I can see why you’d want to stay.’

‘True, I could be more comfortable.’ He gets up and tugs at a corner of the blanket. ‘Come on, then. Make room.’

McKinley goes pink. ‘What- but- I-’

‘Bed-sharing rule only counts if you’re _sleeping_ in the same bed.’ He wriggles in beside McKinley, sighing at the relief of a (relatively) soft mattress beneath him.

‘I’m pretty sure that’s not true’, McKinley argues. ‘Isn’t that rule in place to prevent- you know-’

‘To prevent _what_ , Elder _?_ ’ Kevin asks, grinning, eyes wide. Getting McKinley to say it might make up for his aching knees. ‘What could two missionaries possibly get up to in a bed other than catching some well-deserved z’s?’

McKinley is blushing again. He really does look cute like that. ‘You _know-_ ’

‘I really don’t!’

‘ _You know_ ’, McKinley says, insistent, and shoves Kevin in the chest, and Kevin tips forward to prevent himself from falling off the bed and suddenly their faces are inches apart.

McKinley makes a tiny sound between a whimper and a sigh, and then he’s kissing him, pushing Kevin back against the headboard. His hand is in Kevin’s hair. Kevin’s brain is nothing but static, and by the time he remembers that he’s supposed to _do something_ McKinley is pulling away.

‘Oh god. Oh god, oh god, Elder Price, I’m so sorry, I’m so so sorry-’ His eyes are filled with tears. ‘Please, please, I’m so sorry-’ He starts scrambling away.

‘ _Connor!’_ Kevin grabs his wrist. ‘Please. Don’t go.’

Connor stills. ‘Why?’

Kevin can’t find anything to say. ‘ _Please_.’ This time, it’s Connor’s lips he finds unmoving, at least for a second. Then he moans and kisses back. Kevin winds his hands into Connor’s hair and it feels like _release_ , like a weight lifting off his chest, making him giggle against Connor’s lips.

‘ _God_ ’, Connor whispers. Kevin can feel his breath against his lips. ‘Actually, it’s Kevin’, he whispers back, and it’s the corniest joke in the world, but neither of them can stop giggling.

‘I think that’s technically blasphemy.’ Connor’s thumb brushes his lip. It tickles, a tiny bit.

‘Haven’t you heard? I’m _devilish_.’

**Author's Note:**

> yeah this fic was written over several months so i apologise for any tonal weird TONE WHAT'S THAT  
> who even knows where elder thomas got to he probably came in, saw them asleep on top of each other and was just like 'yeah imma go sleep on the couch'


End file.
